Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
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You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
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