what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
