Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
Little spoons don't ask big questions
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
