That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
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