Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
