Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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