I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
