What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize
