OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
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