um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Randomize