so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Randomize
