i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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