should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
