Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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