I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
