I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
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