just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
