When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Randomize
