He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize