Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
