how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
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No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
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"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
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