I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize
