She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
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