Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
