That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I'm sorry my penis didn't work
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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