my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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