I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Randomize
