You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
