JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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