she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Randomize
