So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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