No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
It's just like the Real World with babies
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
