is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
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