Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
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