and you said cock pushups were impossible
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He passed out mid-signature
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
You may now shotgun with the bride
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize