so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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