this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
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I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
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