Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
