YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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