singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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