ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
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