Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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