How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
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