hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
