It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
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