i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize