i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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