I faked an abortion last night.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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