before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
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