It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Randomize
