Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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