I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
