So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
